Making memories
It’s funny how we get busy doing things, like living with all kinds of issues going on around us, that we forget we are actually making memories at the same time.
We’re continually being told that life is about living in the ‘now’; to be ‘present ‘; to be mindful and to live in the moment; to not look back as we’re not going that way….and they are all good ways of living, but sometimes you want to go back to your memories. They formed us and play a huge role in who we are today, why we act in certain ways, how we manage to move on and cope.
With all that has happened in recent years – bushfires, pandemic, floods, family loss, illness, earthquakes, severe weather events, the situation unfolding in the Ukraine, and so much more – and now mosquito encephalitis threatening us as well, it can be hard to stay or feel in any way resilient. The word that is still being bandied about is ‘unprecedented’, it seems everything is unprecedented at the moment and maybe it is, but I am sick and tired of hearing that word!
Many of those in the flooded areas of Northern NSW have lost everything and yet have to pick up their lives and carry on – how do they do it? I feel so much heartache for so many people and I even feel guilty for sitting in the sunshine while it’s raining in other parts of the country – I think it’s called guilt, anxiety, overwhelm!
We didn’t realise we were making memories, we just knew we were having fun!
Winnie the Pooh
Random thoughts and memories
I don’t really know what I’m trying to say so I’ll just make a few points:
- My younger sister turns 60 this week (there’s only 15 months between us) and she isn’t that happy about it given that when we were young 60 sounded soooo old. Looking back at our memories, all our grandparents, aunts and uncles were ancient and were probably at the time much younger than we are today. I know what she means and feel the same way at times, but now that I’m 61 it’s not so bad – we are relatively fit, healthy, happy, active and more aware. I am trying to help her manage this transition by being the helpful big sister, saying glib things like 60 is the new 30 (twice) but the unexpected death of Shane Warne (Aussie cricketer) at 52 this week, brings home, again, that you really do have to treat each day like it’s your last. Why do we even need these reminders?
Here is a lovely collection of photos from my archives of me with my sister Sharon – we’ve certainly created some memories between us over the years! By the way I haven’t seen my sister in person for over a year, due to lockdowns, family illness and she’s only 5 hours drive down the road!
- I shared this photo of my latest quote card on my Facebook page with the caption:
Let’s not panic just yet – we’ll go for a ride instead! It’s hard not to let all the awful news get to us so we have to do what we can to cope and getting out on the bike certainly helps me to process things.
Getting out for a walk, or a ride certainly helps me cope as does writing things down – that’s how they become memories. How about you?
- As you know by now, I have a daughter and granddaughter living in England and I’m trying to work out when I can travel to see them – it’s been over 2 years now since I last saw them in person. Dottie knows me as Granny, through the screen, but I want to create real memories with her. Just last week I had a glimmer of hope that I could maybe travel to see her for her 3rd birthday later this year and then Russia decided to attack Ukraine, so on top of the pandemic concerns, there’s now also the threat of war escalating – so a glimmer it will stay. I will leave it for a little while but will definitely be trying to get to see them as soon as I feel ‘safe’ to do so. When did it all get so hard? I used to decide on a trip, book flights, make lists of what to pack, where to stay, what to do and then anticipate it for weeks/months but not any more. The Australian borders have only just reopened to international tourists, so we’re not taking anything for granted anymore. Memories of my travels are just that at the moment – memories!
- My sister and I were talking about this on the phone yesterday and we decided it comes down to control, we don’t feel like we have much control over anything these days. This song by Aussie legend Missy Higgins is all about Total Control and was written for a TV show of the same name and it is playing on repeat in my ears. I thought you might like to hear it!
Sunday Stills
Terri is back with Sunday Stills photo challenge for 2022 and the prompt this week is Meaningful Memories. You can read Terri’s post here.
I hope my take on the prompt this week hasn’t been too depressing but I’ve been in one of those reflective/thoughtful moods that strike me every now and again, so thought I’d jot a few things down – it sometimes helps to get these things out of my head 🙂
How do you cope with these issues? I’m keen to know your thoughts.
In the meantime please join me in wishing my sister a very happy birthday! I’m sure she’ll appreciate me telling everyone how old she is!
Deb x
All my Sunday Stills posts can be found here – I’ve been doing these for quite some time now!
Latest posts on Deb’s World:
- An Apple a Day and all that! #WOYP
- It’s the little things that count #SundayStills
- What’s Been on my April Calendar? #WBOYC
- Tackling the Kokoda Track (again)
- Earth Day and a Sculpture Walk #SundayStills
You can also find Deb’s World in lots of other places – stay in touch by clicking any of the buttons below.
Everyone has a story to tell!
Deb is a young-at-heart & active 60+ blogger/retiree, after being made redundant from her 22-year career managing education programs in a men’s correctional centre (jail). She now spends her time reading, blogging, riding her ebike and travelling. Deb was awarded a Bravery Award from the Queen when she was 17 after a tragic accident – a definite life changing moment! She is married with 3 grown-up daughters & has 4 grandchildren. You can read more of Deb’s story here
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Deb's World 
Hi Debbie
It does sound like you have been very reflective. I read something a while ago and it made me think hard. It’s just a saying from a famous therapist “Empathy without boundaries is self sabotage”. Does that make sense as to how you’re feeling. You do so much already to help other people, take some time for yourself and don’t feel guilty. I do hope you get to see your daughter and grandchildren soon and in the meantime carry on zooming.
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Thanks Ali, it was a reflective time that’s for sure. I’m feeling a bit better these days. I like that saying and it’s very true. I have booked our trip to England for August so am feeling quite excited about that!
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Fantastic news, the best time to go to the UK 😊
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Finally getting around to commenting on last weeks posts. So behind…lol. It’s funny how what we used to think as “old” isn’t old anymore. I think I’ve grown to realize that it is just a number, and I get to choose how I feel about it. I loved your photos. I’m a sucker for old photos even if I don’t know the people in them. I hope you get to see your daughter soon. That would be hard.
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Thanks for your lovely comment Kirstin. We are planning to see our daughter this year!
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Hope you can get to see Dottie soon, Deb. Lovely memories. Toni x
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It’s going to happen this year Toni, plans are in place now!
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HB to your sister….and this was a post I really felt as I read it. I need to be honest as the middle of the week is nearly done…I am feeling quite a bit of overwhelm and it’s to do with external events and knowing family members are not well. BUT…what can I do? Not much (yet due to the conditions) but I am also recognising I need some more talking therapy and have scored an appointment tomorrow to see the psychologist I saw last year for a bit. I find the anniversaries for cancer diagnosis and treatments are triggers…and soon it will be 5 years mid May 2022…a LOT has disturbed our world…and covid is the big one here because it’s two years this week everything changed for us here in Australia. Be kind to you…and always up for a chat too. Denyse
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I hope things are going well for you Denyse. Take care and thanks as always!
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After much thought my sister in Perth decided to be positive and book flights for Christmas; she’s younger than me and not retired so she can’t afford to get stranded and not be allowed back into Western Australia! Without Covid she would have been over long ago for moral support with all our dramas. She also hasn’t met her youngest great nephew who will be four soon. I think we have all been stuck in a limbo of uncertainty.
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That’s great to hear she’s booked her trip. I’m seriously thinking of just biting the bullet.
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Ah life by Pooh. If only it was that simple. Unprecedented and difficult to process and balance. Yes we can control our input but we can’t put our heads in the sand so I can understand why it can become overwhelming. I’ve been quiet on my blog trying to sort out my feelings and responses to the world issues while breaking with some serious family concerns. Life is complex and messy so we must live in the moment and enjoy what we have hence making good memories. Bernie ps tell your sister Happy Birthday and welcome to the wonderful 60’s.
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Yes if only it was that simple Bernie! Finding balance seems to be something many of struggle with. Thanks to for the birthday wishes for my sister, she’s accepted that the years ahead are special!
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Balance of course is key. So much so that my blog is named for it! Writing really helps me with mine but sometimes life throws a lot of hard curve balls fast at us and then it becomes a rollercoaster. Bernie
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This is a great pep talk and seeing one of my favorite Pooh quotes here makes me feel even better about things, Deb!
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Yes Pooh quotes always make the world a better place!
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Not depressing, real. You’re saying what we all feel, overwhelmed.
“Unprecedented!” I’m with you on that one 🙂
I used to complain about the security at airports. Who knew the world was going to fall apart?
Happy birthday to your sister 🙂
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Thanks for the birthday wishes to my sister, she had a great time and we surprised her with a zoom party which is so 2022!!
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Hi Deb, lately we have had a lot to process and some days it seems like it would be easier to fall apart, but since that wouldn’t accomplish anything, we carry on. One way we do that is through writing, which is why I love posts like this one. You’ve reminded us to look for strength within and to lean on each other as well. I also think it helps to ‘manage intake’ as Leanne wrote and to not dwell on things out of our control. There is much that we can accomplish on a personal level and that is where I have to keep my focus.
Happy Birthday to your sister and welcome to the ‘best decade.’
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Yes Suzanne we do carry on and writing helps me to do that. Thanks for your great words, they help me understand that what I’m feeling is normal and we can all help in some way.
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I was told many years ago not to worry about things I have no control over, including getting older, Debbie. Life is what it is at whatever age you are. And it’s up to each one of us to live the life we want. After all, we’re in control of what we do and how we live our lives regardless of how old we are. Life changes, which I’m grateful for as otherwise, it would be very boring and dull, and who wants a boring and dull life?
However, some events, such as the current situation in Ukraine, sit at the back of my mind and wiggle around, causing me concern. Although I have no control over what is happening, there are still things I can do to help those in the conflict and myself, such as donating money to charity to help the millions who have been forced to uproot their lives and seek safety. This helps my concerned mind a little knowing that the money I have donated will be helping. I hope so, anyway.
And I will carry on looking for ways of helping those in situations I have no control over. So not only am I allowing myself to help me, but also those who need help.
Thank you for sharing your memories with us. I love looking back at the past because of all the happy memories that exist there,
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Thanks for your wise words Hugh and you are so right with all you say. I also find that donating money to a reputable charity helps me feel that I am supporting those in need. Looking back is always fun!
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I really hope you get your UK trip this year, but oh yes, the things we took for granted when planning visits! I went to reunion meal last week with people I was at school with. One of the people there was on a trip over from Perth, Australia. He still has elderly parents living here and used to come over a couple of times a year but that all stopped and he hasn’t been back for a long time. We always have a get together when he is back in the UK so hopefully he will be able to come back again this winter.
Happy birthday to your sister!
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Since my post Deb, I am onto planning our trip for later this year as it is very important to me. Thanks for the birthday wishes for my sister 🙂
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Hi Deb, such an honest post and know that you aren’t alone feeling this way. The world seems out of control at the moment and I worry for my grandsons – what world will they grow up in? So much heartache with the floods and yes Shane Warne’s passing has certainly been a wake up call for many to appreciate the moment – but that can be difficult sometimes when there is so much despair surrounding us. Thanks again for your honesty and I’m sending a big hug which I hope will help a little…..
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Thanks Sue, I’m so glad to have your friendship and understanding!
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Nice memories Deb. Missy’s version is so good. It is hard seeing friends and family trying to put some of their life back together here after the floods and some people are still under water a week later!!
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That’s it exactly Brian, it’s just so awful seeing what’s happening around at the moment. I did enjoy sharing my sisterly love memories 🙂
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Hi, Debbie –
I greatly appreciate your honesty in this post. It’s been a long series of horrible things out of our control. Just as it seems like that there might be a light at the end of the tunnel, a new (unexpected) freight train is headed our way. What works for me is being able to honestly share with others whom I trust — it reminds us that we are not alone. Your post was very helpful.
Finally, wishing a very happy birthday to Sharon!
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Many thanks for your kind words Donna, I try to be honest and authentic and feel by sharing my thoughts to my closest blogging friends, they will understand and help me feel more uplifted! You always do that for me so thank you again for being there!
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Agree that 60 is not old at all. The photos with your sis are adorable. 😊
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Many thanks, not sure she’ll agree with me telling the world her age but it’s meant well! We are adorable 🙂
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😉👍
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Love your sister photos! Sisters are one of life’s best treasures.
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They are indeed Carol and as I have one sister and one brother I feel very fortunate! My sister and i are only 15 months apart so are quite close in lots of ways.
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What a fun post with all the sister photos and memories. My own younger sister followed me into the 60’s last year. And I’m missing the grandkids too. In May it will be 3 years since I’ve seen them. I’m thankful for Facetime, so at least I can chat with them that way – but it’s truly not the same as a person to person hug and snuggle, is it?
Loved your post!
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Thanks for your lovely comment Trisha, we are all suffering from being apart from our grandkids aren’t we? I get hugs and kisses through the screen but a real hug is infinitely better 🙂 Fingers crossed we can get to do that sooner rather than later.
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Your sister will love the 60s, I know we do, so continue to set that good example for her. My poor brother just turned 59 in February and was flat on his back for a week due to an injury, then topped it off with a kidney stone! You are right about the way we live our lives always creating a memory of some kind, good and bad. Love your quotes and see that you and I and Marsha went with the Dr Seuss quote! Very apt. Our world is so different now than it was 2 years ago, and different again from 21 years ago when the US experienced 9-11 terrorism which changed how we travel by air. Sigh… In the end, the connections and memories we make with our families is what really matter. Beautiful post, my friend!
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Thanks Terri, that Dr Seuss quote is the best so I’m in good company with you and Marsha using it! Yes it’s the connections and memories we make that really matter in the end. Thanks for your lovely kind comment 🙂
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60+ isn’t so bad, is it? In fact, these are some of my best years (so far 🙂 ). Lovely pictures of you and your sister.
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No 60+ isn’t bad at all Janis and I too think it’s one of the best decades of my life so far! Thanks for dropping by 🙂
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Love the photos of you with your sister. You don’t look alike.
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Thanks Stevie, we are different in a few ways in looks and personality but we know we’re sisters!
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Deb – great post! and seeing your “let’s not panic” sign reminded me of a hand made sign I just posted on my blog abut an hour ago – someone stitched “take life easy” and I shared it with the “odds and ends” photo challenge.
anyhow, seeing that sign with your advice – to go for a ride – was quite nice.
prayers for Ukraine – and enjoyed the beautiful sisters’ images
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Thanks for understanding Yvette! I saw your post with your ‘take life easy’ stitching, how clever we are to be in tune. My sister and I always have fun when taking photos together 🙂
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I love being in tune with little things like this – makes blogging even more fun!
And cheers to sisters that can also be such great friends
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I know exactly how you feel – overwhelmed by things we can’t do anything about from viruses to natural disasters to war. There is a fine balance with staying informed and being all consumed with news. I feel exactly like you regarding travel…think we will wait a little longer before making plans. All the very best from over the Tasman.
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Thanks for understanding, it’s not like me to dwell on things like this but the past few years/months/weeks have been a bit intense! I really appreciate your wishes from across the ditch and right back at you!
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Hi Deb – and a big happy birthday to Sharon (and a welcome to the lovely 60’s club!) There is certainly a lot of horrible stuff happening in the world around us – pandemics, floods, droughts. wars….. I’m just grateful for my life and I’m taking it one day at a time – and trying very hard to keep my exposure to bad news at a low level – if I can’t fix it or help it, then I’m better managing my intake of it. I really hope you get the chance to fly to England sooner rather than later. x
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Thanks Leanne, one day at a time is my mantra too at the moment but some days it seems harder than others. Maybe because I have a sore eye (a sty forming maybe), it all seems hard! Staying away from the news is definitely one way of coping. Thanks for Sharon’s birthday wishes, I just hope she’ll be OK with me posting this!
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